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Tuesday, March 29, 2011

real life?


There's a table in my basement right by the window where it's perfect for sketching, crafting, homeworking, playing, reading and whatever else-ing

Quite often if I want to use it I have to make room by digging my way through the piles of books my boys have read there.
I had to laugh and snap a picture this time.
  • The Far Side Gallery 
  • American Standard of Perfection 1985 edition (poultry)
  • Children's World Atlas
  • The Dangerous Book For Boys
  • a Sketch book and some markers
These books weren't there because they'd cast them aside on their way to do something else.
They were there because they had been intently studied and read!
At least my boys are well rounded?
and geniuses?

It doesn't matter!
It makes me smile!

BTW: one of these boys when he was 6 asked me, while I was driving, and I was extremely pregnant (significant because pregnancy makes it hard for me to concentrate so I was already distracted.)
Son: "Mom, why does the word matter have two definitions? One being it has no consequence and the other being the basic element everything is made of. How do those two definitions relate to each other?"

Me: thinking, what? where did this child come from? and concentrating so hard I missed the speed limit sign that said it changed from 40 to 25...ooops...

The Police Officer wasn't compassionate at all on this pregnant woman with 4 children in the car who apologized profusely and said she didn't speed intentionally, she was only distracted by this extremely intelligent question that just came out of her 6 year old's mouth as this same son asked him if he was going to arrest his mother.

No, not compassionate at all......he gave her/me a ticket!

So On my birthday (7:30 am) I went to the court house to see if I could get the judge to reduce my fine and the points on my DL. I couldn't find anyone to watch my youngest (3) and so I packed a bag with books and a few toys and waddled my 8 1/2 months pregnant self to the courthouse. 
I placed the tote bag on the conveyor belt that went through the x-ray machine and herded my little man through the metal detector and then I went through too.
On the other side the security officer was taking a close look at my bag through the x-ray machine. 
Finally he stopped and asked with a confused and amused grin, "Mam, do you happen to have an octopus in your bag?"

"I probably do." I answered as I opened the bag and pulled out a small red octopus with its legs spread wide.

The man laughed and said I couldn't figure out why you'd have a Chinese star in your diaper bag so I decided it had to be an octopus.

I laughed and said, "And I bet you've never had to ask anyone if they have an octopus in their bag before?"

"No, and I probably never will again either." he said.

When it was finally my turn to see the judge and plead for leniency my little man had HAD it and the judge did not look happy to see my little man there.  

After hearing my side of things the judge offered to take the ticket off of my record completely if I went to driving school.
I told him I'd like to but I didn't think I'd have time because I was due if a few weeks to deliver my 5th child.

He nodded his head and then it was like it finally registered in his mind what I'd just said because he stopped, his eyes got wide and he said, "Wait. What? How many kids did you just say?"

"Fifth." I answered

He shook his head and said, "Yeah, you're right, you won't have time."

I guess he took pity on me because he reduced my fine from $250 to $30 and took all of the points off of my DL record.
Happy Birthday to me!

I guess the point to all of this is ..... if your boys read like this it can be a good and a bad thing but it's definitely worth it for the amusing story.

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