Snowman

I'm not sure what to say about this..... :)
It's the Snowman Skit revisited with four of the current YW leaders.
Yeah we're awesome like that!

Proof that Utah is becoming the Pacific Northwest

Once upon a time we lived in Oregon.

A place of green year round.

With slugs the length of your hand

and

A bounty of large snails under every leaf.

One day MDH ran something out to the trash can in his socks in the dark.

A generous size snail lost his life that evening under the clean white sock clad heal of my husband.

It was a shock to MDH to hear the crunch and feel the squish but I'm sure it was an even bigger shock to the snail..

..or maybe he didn't feel a thing.....Do snails have feelings?

Anyway

We know snails and they're gross.

and we know they aren't supposed to abound in Utah.

However

This year they did.

Want proof.

Check out this butternut squash we found in our garden this autumn.

So what happened to the snails?  

They all got chucked as hard and as far as they would go over the fence.
(Not into the neighbor's yard...into the part where we have no neighbors. Just so you know.)

What happened to the squash?

MDH can't remember if it was salvageable or not.

Maybe I don't want to know.

Good for a laugh

I saw some at a local shop today. I laughed so hard I had to share!
I think this may be just what I was looking for, perfect for the family white elephant gift exchange, even thought it wouldn't exactly be a white elephant.

Kid History - Episode 6 - by BoredShortsTV

Ellen....my new best friend

Wednesday I met my love at Quincy Market to grab some lunch and do some shopping.
When we got there, there was a huge crowd standing around and TV cameras so I asked someone who they were waiting for. They said, "Ellen Degeneres".
My love and I didn't stick around, we went on our way and found some tasty treats and other fun things to purchase.
When my love had to go back to his meetings but I decided to stick around the market.
I hadn't been there long when who should appear but my new friend Ellen.
She arrived in style......of course.....on a duckboat.

I quickly realized she would be walking right past me so I prepared to snap some awesome photos of my new friend.

I was all ready when she walked by....

Then this ginormous freckled arm came from nowhere and thwarted my photo plans.

But I wasn't too concerned because I still had a second to snap another pic.

But then the friendly lady next to me with the "I love Ellen" shirt decided I really didn't need to get an up close picture of my new friend.

But that's okay because I figured I could get a picture while she was standing and receiving her award from the city of Boston.

But then Ellen decided to stand right behind the gigantic column.

See the podium, that's where she was.

But at least the beagle had a good view.

Freak Spring Storms....

......Produce beautiful rainbows

And make Peregrine Falcons appear and dine in your yard.

By the way, I think they have a nest near by because there are definitely two of them and my boys think they are way awesome.

And the awesomeness meter almost short-circuited because the amount of awesomeness was so overwhelming when the boys saw that the bird was eating a bird in their very own front yard.

Awesome!

(at least that's the word they (the younger two boys and their little sister) kept using)

real life?

There's a table in my basement right by the window where it's perfect for sketching, crafting, homeworking, playing, reading and whatever else-ing

Quite often if I want to use it I have to make room by digging my way through the piles of books my boys have read there.

I had to laugh and snap a picture this time.

• The Far Side Gallery 
• American Standard of Perfection 1985 edition (poultry)
• Children's World Atlas
• The Dangerous Book For Boys
• a Sketch book and some markers

These books weren't there because they'd cast them aside on their way to do something else.

They were there because they had been intently studied and read!

At least my boys are well rounded?

and geniuses?

It doesn't matter!

It makes me smile!

BTW: one of these boys when he was 6 asked me, while I was driving, and I was extremely pregnant (significant because pregnancy makes it hard for me to concentrate so I was already distracted.)

Son: "Mom, why does the word matter have two definitions? One being it has no consequence and the other being the basic element everything is made of. How do those two definitions relate to each other?"

Me: thinking, what? where did this child come from? and concentrating so hard I missed the speed limit sign that said it changed from 40 to 25...ooops...

The Police Officer wasn't compassionate at all on this pregnant woman with 4 children in the car who apologized profusely and said she didn't speed intentionally, she was only distracted by this extremely intelligent question that just came out of her 6 year old's mouth as this same son asked him if he was going to arrest his mother.

No, not compassionate at all......he gave her/me a ticket!

So On my birthday (7:30 am) I went to the court house to see if I could get the judge to reduce my fine and the points on my DL. I couldn't find anyone to watch my youngest (3) and so I packed a bag with books and a few toys and waddled my 8 1/2 months pregnant self to the courthouse. 

I placed the tote bag on the conveyor belt that went through the x-ray machine and herded my little man through the metal detector and then I went through too.

On the other side the security officer was taking a close look at my bag through the x-ray machine. 

Finally he stopped and asked with a confused and amused grin, "Mam, do you happen to have an octopus in your bag?"

"I probably do." I answered as I opened the bag and pulled out a small red octopus with its legs spread wide.

The man laughed and said I couldn't figure out why you'd have a Chinese star in your diaper bag so I decided it had to be an octopus.

I laughed and said, "And I bet you've never had to ask anyone if they have an octopus in their bag before?"

"No, and I probably never will again either." he said.

When it was finally my turn to see the judge and plead for leniency my little man had HAD it and the judge did not look happy to see my little man there.  

After hearing my side of things the judge offered to take the ticket off of my record completely if I went to driving school.

I told him I'd like to but I didn't think I'd have time because I was due if a few weeks to deliver my 5th child.

He nodded his head and then it was like it finally registered in his mind what I'd just said because he stopped, his eyes got wide and he said, "Wait. What? How many kids did you just say?"

"Fifth." I answered

He shook his head and said, "Yeah, you're right, you won't have time."

I guess he took pity on me because he reduced my fine from $250 to $30 and took all of the points off of my DL record.

Happy Birthday to me!

I guess the point to all of this is ..... if your boys read like this it can be a good and a bad thing but it's definitely worth it for the amusing story.

World Domination with Applesauce

My plan to rule the WORLD!

Applesauce Facials! People will think they are an innocent way to keep their skin looking baby soft - like mine. But through the sauce they will be under my control!!!!



(Diabolical laugh) Ha-ha-ha

HEE-hee-hee-hee.....

ha.......?

Huh?.....you're not laughing?

What? You don't think it'll work? Hmmm.....





Okay......I'll just eat it then. Do you want some too? I'll share!

My son: the comedian

Truth or Bear: a popular game at mountain men slumber parties.

Son # the oldest boy, surprised me with this drawing the other day. 

His sense of humor kills me.

So I had to share! of course.

Hello?

{tap, tap, tap, tap} Is this thing on?

Hello?

{clearing throat}

Hello!

Hi!

It's been a while, I know.

We celebrated a lot last month.

Between family parties, birthdays, Christmas & New Years; throw in Christmas shopping, candy making, crafting, gift making, lesson giving, visiting, sledding, football watching, game playing, cooking, more family dinners, learning & loving..and before any of that could be done SEWING SEWING SEWING...We had a very busy month.

.....But we survived!

...and this past week...

after the kids went back to school....

I CRASHED!!!

HARD!

But it felt good.

So I thought I'd share 1 out of the handful of pictures I snapped in the month of December.

First, the day before Christmas, I was in the kitchen (strategic neighbor gift giving planning and prep zone) preparing neighbor gifts to be delivered by my elves when I heard my husband call out, 

"There's the Grinch! He's driving down the street in his chair."

I ran to the door just in time to see him turn the corner and go around the block.

So, I grabbed my camera and waved him down as he came back around the block.

He said he was looking for little Cindy.

Isn't this awesome!

Did you notice the green grass.

Like I said this picture was taken Dec. 24th. By December 27th the green grass was gone and we were officially  blanketed in winter white that stuck around.

Not sure how I feel about that....still undecided!

Happy Monday!

What's in your nose?

My friend sent me this card.....................I laughed and laughed.

I didn't even have to read what she had written inside to know why she sent it.

I'll tell you the story.
Stop me if you've heard this one.
Well,.... most of you (if you've ever talked to me in person) probably have heard it.... but you can't really stop me from writing.......So, feel free to click away at any time, or not.
It's up to you.
I'll be telling the story wether or not you choose to read.
You see, that's why these blogs are such a good thing for me, because I'm a teller of stories - not in the untruths sort of way but in the sharing of truths that are amazing, funny, inspiring, and interesting - at least to me. So in a blog I can put my stories out there and imagine that people are interested in what I have to say rather than worrying about if they're just trying to be polite by listening.
So here it goes.

It all started in the spring of 2002. We moved into a new (to us) rental house with a great yard. There were apple, pear and plum trees, lots of room for a garden and lots and lots of old rotten fruit all over the yard.
We had three kids at the time; Banana 5, Duder almost 4, and Doodle 20 months.

The yard was great because it was fenced and for the first time I felt like the kids could play outside and be relatively safe without me hovering over them every moment. I really enjoyed watching the kids through the window playing with the ants or digging in the dirt out back while I did the dishes inside. 

It all seemed too good to be true.....I guess it really was.

One day Doodle (20 months) sat on the floor in the kitchen playing. I sat down to play with him when suddenly he sneezed. The sneeze wasn't that surprising but what came out of his nose was -

•  a pea,
•  a piece of cracker,
•  a piece of cheese,
•  a cherry pit, 
• a small rock 
•  three bird seeds.

 I was horrified!
 How could all of that stuff  have been in my baby's nose?
 I looked up his nose and there was MORE up there!

 Mostly peas, which, we were able to get out.

A few days later we (my husband and I) started to notice that our baby stunk but not because he was dirty, he was clean, squeaky in fact. While we were discussing what could be going on our daughter mentioned that she had seen Doodle putting things in his nose again, .....outside.
First I thought, "Why did you not mention this before?" and then "What did he find outside to stick up his nose?"

Sure enough he had a nose full of junk --- not just any junk though ---- A nose full of plum pits!!!
He had stuck the plum pit in wide end first so, all we could see was the pointy end of the pit way - way -way up there. We didn't know how we were going to get that thing out of there but we knew we had to try.

I don't know if you've ever attempted to wrestle and pin a 40 pound octopus while trying to extract a foreign body from one of his orifices, but it's hard, very hard.
It involves flailing appendages and a lot of screaming.
After quite a few tries we decided that the tweezers were going to do a lot more damage than good with our little guy worked up the way he was. Our solution was to try again after he fell asleep.

So during the night while Doodle was sound asleep in his bed we crept silently to his side, tweezers and flashlight in hand.
Can you imagine waking up to your parents leaning over your face with tweezers and a flashlight? If that's not a lifetime of therapy waiting to happen I don't know what is. Needless to say we were unsuccessful again so we decided to let our pediatrician have a go at it in the morning.
Luckily he was able to retrieve it fairly painlessly.

Naively, I thought the experience had been traumatic enough that my baby wouldn't try to stick things up his nose again.
Boy was I wrong!
I underestimated the stubbornness of my boy.
Two days later we were in the doctor's office again, this time it was a couple of cherry pits up his nose.

A few days after that it was another plum pit.

Our dream yard had turned into a nightmare. All of the old rotten fruit in the grass offered a plethora of nose stuffing items.

Our frequent pediatrician visits continued for a few weeks and I built a strange kind of friendship with the nurses and office staff.
After I discovered Doodle had stuck something up his nose I would call the Dr.'s office.

Our phone conversation usually went something like this.

Me, "Hi, this is Carol ----. Doodle has stuck something up his nose again."

Dr.'s office slightly trying to cover the receiver, talking to the other office staff, "Doodle's done it again." "Laugh, laugh, snort, giggle" "Really?" "Giggle, belly laugh, snort." "Okay, you can bring him right in. See you in a couple of minutes."

Me, "Thank you.....I think."

-

Once I told someone how many times I had taken Doodle to the doctor's office to have things taken out of his nose. She laughed and said, "They [office staff] must laugh really hard when they get off the phone with you."

My response was, "They don't wait until they get off the phone."

-

Eventually our pediatrician sent me home with my own tools to extract various foreign objects from my child's nose. I was concerned that our insurance wouldn't pay for the tools and I didn't think we could afford them. Our pediatrician told me not to worry about it, he wasn't going to charge us and I could bring the tools back once Doodle had grown out of this obsession with his nose.

The doctor figured this would save us both a lot of time. He was right, it did save a lot of time but we did have the occasional pesky cherry pit that just wouldn't cooperate. On such occasions the doctor had to get inventive with some I.V. tubing for example.
I won't go into details but let me just say to all of you, avoid sticking cherry pits in your nose......at all costs.
During this particular cherry pit removal the pit slipped back instead of coming out of the front of his nose. The doctor didn't know if the pit had gone into Doodle's stomach or into his lungs -- (Doodle was screaming pretty good when the pit slipped.)
 If it had gone in his stomach no big deal but if it was in his lungs he needed immediate surgery.
So off we went to the hospital for some x-rays. Luckily it was in his stomach.

-

It just so happened that this experience was traumatic enough that it almost did the trick of curing him of his fascination with his nose.
I think he only had one or two more times after this.

-

It all finally ended with a bang........Literally. One evening while we were saying a blessing on dinner I heard Doodle sneeze and then a loud bang on the table. After the prayer I opened my eyes and there on the table sat a pit encased in neon green slime.
I had no idea how long it had been in up his nose but by the looks of things it had been quite a while. Doodle seemed very relieved to have it out and as far as I know he hasn't tried to stick anything in there since then.

-

That- was the longest year of my life.

-

The other day I saw Doodle holding a Lego piece up to his face, close to his nose.

My inner calm, patient voice said, "That's no big deal. Let's wait and watch and see what the young one does."

My hyperactive, over-reacting, over-protective mom voice said, "What, are you crazy? Knock that thing out of his hand. Get it as far away from his nose as possible."

I find that as a mother my inner calm voice doesn't win out very often. This was no exception - well, maybe it was a compromise because what I ended up saying was, "Doodle, please don't put that toy by your nose and whatever you do, don't put it in your nose."

He smiled, because he remembers. Then he said, "Okay mom."

-

And that was that.

-

Now, you know why the card made me laugh.

1)Because I'm so glad that part of our life is over.

2)Because, Yeah --- the whole experience was just crazy, funny.

3)Did I mention I'm glad it's over?

4)I pray my baby now doesn't decide she's fascinated with fruit pits and her nose.

5)We have no fruit trees in our yard.

-

Thanks Cheryn for the laugh!

This has been a novel, I know.

Congratulations on reading the whole thing


P.S. My boy is a tease!
Once he asked my mom for 2 suckers. (I think he was 5)
She said "Okay, but why do you need 2 suckers?"
"One for me, One for my nose." was his answer.
You should have seen my mom's face. It was priceless.
You should have seen my boy's face. It was priceless too.

Cure for the Rainy Day Blues

It's a rainy day here today.

I'm not sure how I feel about that.

I guess I like it, but I'm not looking forward to a long, cold winter.

I try not to think about it too much because it usually ends up making me blue.

But I have a good cure for the Blues!

Spending time reading with the kids at the Elementary School.

 I try to spend a little time in my son's class each week and I love it.

 I usually end up laughing at one or all of the kids in his class, plus they like me ....... they really like me. 

So of course that makes me feel good. 

One time the kids got new reading anthology books while I was there. 

I happened to be within hearing range of my son and I heard him say to his friend.

 "This is my new book and I shall name him George Lucas. He will be my best friend. Come George, let us read."

 My son's friend laughed held up his book and said, "You shall be known as Abraham Lincoln." 

I thought I was going to fall over because I was laughing so hard.

So I guess what I'm say is find some way to give of yourself to your community! You get so much more back than you give.

When Cheese Attacks

If you're going to shake the Parmesan cheese really hard to break up the cheese balls please be sure the lid is on tight!

After the cheese went flying everywhere this is what I heard.

 

• Baby Girl: Gannoli, Gannoli! (Not sure what this means, maybe she was copying me)
• Me: HOLY CANOLLI!
• Oldest Son: Holy flying cheese batman!
• Middle Son: Why do the dairy products keep exploding at our house! (a couple of weeks ago a brand new gallon of milk got dropped and exploded in the kitchen - milk EVERYWHERE!)
• Youngest Son: OH MAN!
• Oldest of All-Second Mother-Girly Girl: What happened? -----There's cheese in your hair mom.

Youngest Son grabbed the camera so we could record this for our posterity.

And this dude grabbed the broom and started cleaning up the floor before I was even sure what had happened.


Then he turned the broom into a guitar and took a second to serenade us as Elvis.
Elvis has cleaned the building!

Yes, we are a lively group!

Please, consider this just a friendly warning. Cheese can attack!

I'm not a teenager......WHAT?

           Quote:

My 6 year old said,

"Mom!

You got some new shoes!

Why did you get teenager shoes?

You. Are. NOT. A Teenager!"

Thank you son, I'd been wondering.

Waxing Old

I've been thinking, it's been a very long time since I've been asked, while shopping, "Are all of those children yours?!"

And then been told, "But you look so young!"


This could be because
A) we now live in a place were a family of 7 is considered a small family.


OR


B) I just don't look that young any more.

I'm going with A. It's just easier on my ego. ;0)

BEWARE THE FINGER!

Sounds like a spooky story a scout would tell around the camp-fire.
Or
Alternate title:
Bowlers Beware!!!

Behind this seemingly innocent, purple-ish bandage lurks an infection of epic proportions!
An infection that at any moment could turn into a giant slim monster and stomp through the streets of Salt Lake City smashing houses, eating cars and making little school girls cry out, "Sweet polyester! What is that thing?!"

It all started with our annual MLKJ (civil liberties) day bowling outing, a hang-nail and a bowling alley borrowed ball with finger holes just a smidgen too small.

(Side note- we started this bowling tradition back in GP. What better way to celebrate knocking down the barriers and walking a mile in another's shoes?)

We all had a great time and MDH barely noticed when his finger got caught in the ball and the hang-nail ripped off. WE all took notice when his finger started to swell and change color. Epsom Salt soaks and Neosporin applications proved to be no match for the monster growing within.
After some nagging from me and "Thou shalt obey thy parents" (Thanks mom) we found ourselves at the InstaCare where the on duty Dr. agreed his finger did look like a monster and we needed to take action.
Unfortunately, taking action included numbing (the worst part because one of the shots was right in the cuticle! YIKEES!) and scrubbing the finger as well as a tetanus shot and some antibiotics.

MDH's mom said he would get better faster because he listened to his mother and went to the Dr. We're all banking on that! (Again thanks mom.)

In the mean time (until the bandage gets changed to a different color anyway) it's open season on Barney songs around here. But I think MDH and I are the only ones allowed to do that. So if you see us and you sing a Barney song
BEWARE THE FINGER!!!!

Baby Animals!

We took the kids to the zoo this weekend and really animals don't get much cuter than this.
We absolutely fell in love with the baby elephant -Zuri.
I mean really how often do you get to see a baby elephant in person.
She acted so much like my toddler it wasn't even funny!!!

This guy looked a little grumpy....probably close to what I look like in the morning.

I love the zoo!!!

Quite Simply My Favorite Show!!!

Why do I LOVE the Amazing Race?

This article pretty much sums it up! Here

Mark my words ----SOMEDAY HUBBY AND I WILL BE CONTESTANTS!!!

I have no doubt because

1. We're hilarious!
2. We're entertaining!
3. We're odd (in the sense that we're completely run of the mill, old-fashioned, average, married couple, stay at home mom - go to work dad, parents of 5 kids, who like to sing and dance around the house, try to have adventures everyday with our kids, like to pretend we're on the amazing race just so we can practice, good at agreeing to disagree or just agreeing couple)!
4. We're talented -- oh boy are we ever talented! If I'm being honest here then you need to know -- our skill sets are almost beyond words, we have brownie making skills, we have root beer connoisseur skills, wild animal taming skills, chaos wrangling skills, foreign language skills (I can speak toddler like nobody's business), the list could go on and on.
5. By the time we get around to submitting our application we'll be the old couple on the show and if we're entertaining NOW just wait until then!

Can't wait to watch the new season premier tonight!!!

A little crazy at the local Wal-of-all-Marts!

It's no secret that I've had my fair share of crazy moments at the Wall.
Yes I went ballistic on the employee who didn't want me to take my cart into the bathroom because she was afraid I'd steal the loaf of bread I had in my cart and because she didn't understand I needed that cart to hold my infant and toddler while I helped my other toddler who was getting sick all over the place. Yes I threw the loaf of bread at her and hit her in the head but we're not going to talk about that today.

NO!

Today we're going to talk about the crazy check-out girl (what's the p.c. word for them? Anyway.....)
Today while checking out @ the Wall the girl scanned my Cascade dishwasher detergent and then she sniffed it. While holding my box of detergent and taking a very deep breath she looks at me and says, "AHHHHH, that smells soooooo gooooood." all long and drawn out.
Sniffs again, "MMMmmmmMMM"
"Oh, man you don't know how good that smells!"
Sniffs AGAIN.
"I don't even have words to describe how good this smells."
AGAIN sniffs.
"Do you know what I mean."
Me, "UM, no."
She sniffs once more. "OH, that's good stuff"
Me thinking...........AWKWARD!!!! Is she ever going to put that box down and get on with it?

Finally she bags the Cascade and gets on with business.
Then she starts to say something about how they do business there at their store.
I say something like this, "When I lived in Reno the Wall Mart did....blah...blah...."
She says, "Where was that?"
I say, "Reno."
She says, "Reno, Utah? where's that?"
I say, "NO, Reno Nevada."
she says, "Are you sure it's in Nevada? Not California?"
I say, "I'm pretty sure we lived in Nevada."
She says, "Oh, it's hard to tell which Reno, there's just so many of them."
I say, "Okay?"
I think-----WOW---sniffing to much Cascade and who knows what else!

At least the Wall is good for a story or two!!!

Watermelon ----- Mmmmm---Gooood!

There's something you need to know about me. I LOVE fruit!!!!!! If I could I would live on fresh fruit. If you ever want to give me a gift just bring me a nice fresh fruit salad and I'll love you forever. I'm very loyal that way.

My family is probably sick of watermelon already this summer because I can't get enough. But, I have to gorge myself now just so I can make it through the winter months when the watermelon just isn't as good and it's way too expensive.

I've been buying seedless watermelon because, lets face it, it is so much easier to eat. Yesterday, however, the grocery store I went to was OUT of seedless...........what?.......how could that be?.......so......I.....bought........a SEEDEd melon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh my it was SOOOOO GOOOOOD! The juiciness and sweetness was beyond compare. I just wanted to put my face right into the melon and eat until I passed out.

Wish I was this cute doing that.

Oh watermelon I love you!!!!

I love you when you're square.

I love you with a face.


I even love you carved as flowers with a weird twig sticking out.


Bring on the melon! Bring on the summer fun!

Watermelon Cooler
By, Paula Deen
1 1/2 pounds (4 cups) sliced seedless watermelon, rind removed
1 cup Lemon Sorbet
1 lemon, zested
1 1/2 cups cold water
Watermelon wedges and mint, for garnish
Directions
In a food processor, blend watermelon, sorbet, and lemon zest until very smooth. Stir in 1 1/2 cups cold water; cover and refrigerate until very cold. Serve over ice and garnish with watermelon wedges and mint.